Tokens of Appreciation
by NickyM96
Summary: [Light MSR] Scully begins to wonder about Mulder's unusual behavior. Written for Mulder's Refuge June Post Ep Challenge. Spoilers for Wetwired.


Title - Tokens of Appreciation  
  
Author - Nicky  
  
Rating - PG  
  
Keywords - Light MSR, Light Angst  
  
Spoilers - Wetwired  
  
Summary - Scully begins to wonder about Mulder's unusual behavior. Written for Mulder's Refuge June Post Ep Challenge.  
  
Disclaimer - These characters don't belong to me. They belong to Chris Carter and 1013 productions.  
  
Scully stops outside of the door to the office and takes a deep breath, almost afraid to enter. Mulder has been acting a bit peculiar lately and she has no idea what to expect from him today. She can usually handle her mercurial partner. But his moods are generally a bit more recognizable despite their unpredictability. They may change from day to day, but at least she knows what they are and how to deal with them. On the days when he's grumpy, she tries to smile more. It tends to make him happier. On days when he's hyper, she substitutes his coffee with tea or decaf. Or sometimes she makes sure they walk to the cafe down the street for lunch so that he can burn off some of the excess energy. On days when he's naughty . . . well on those days, she tends to play along because those are the days when he's the most fun. A smile comes to her face when she thinks about how he blushed the first time she responded to one of his colorful comments.  
  
But lately, he's just been weird. She can't pinpoint the mood. But she knows it's one she doesn't recognize. And if she doesn't recognize it, she doesn't know how to respond to it. She's not too worried, though. He doesn't act like anything is bothering him. In fact, he's seemed downright giddy this past week. Despite the bad resolution to their latest case involving the altered television signals, which consequently ended with her own hospitalization.  
  
With a shrug, she decides to not think about it. She'll just wait and see what he has in store for her today. She pushes the door open and goes into the office, surprised to see that it's empty. He usually beats her into work, but not always. So she doesn't give his absence much thought.   
  
She's just getting settled for the day when the door opens. She looks up in time to see Mulder waltz in, a bright smile lighting up his face when he sees her.  
  
"Morning, Scully," he says, walking over to her desk and setting down a cup of coffee and a box with what is probably her only food temptation.  
  
"Mulder, tell me you didn't go all the way out to Rosalinda's just to get this cinnamon roll for me," she gasps. "It's almost an hour away from here."  
  
"Anything for you, partner," he says, giving her a wink before proceeding to his own desk.   
  
"Thank you," she finally says once the shock wears off. "This is my favorite."  
  
"I know. That's why I got it for you. I just wanted to do something special for you."  
  
There he is again. Weird Mulder. And she finds that she's unable to respond. When she thinks about it, she really shouldn't have been surprised this morning at his little gift. He's been giving them all week. The first day, he bought her a beautiful arrangement of yellow and white roses. When she asked him why, he just shrugged and said that every woman should get flowers from time to time. Two days later, he treated her to lunch at Filomena's. And just yesterday he gave her a gift certificate to the new day spa that just opened in Georgetown. Although she's not complaining about the gifts, she's starting to wonder when the other shoe is going to fall, so to speak. If she and Mulder were dating, she'd assume he was cheating on her and was using the gifts to assuage his guilt. But knowing him, he's just trying to butter her up before he brings up some ridiculous case, she realizes.   
  
She decides to let him off the hook. The gifts have been wonderful, but enough is enough. It's time for Mulder to show his hand.  
  
"Okay, Mulder. Just tell me the case. I promise I won't laugh outright, no matter how ludicrous the situation," she says.  
  
"What case?" he asks, genuine confusion showing on his face.  
  
"The case you want us to investigate. Or the body you want me to examine. You've been treating me like a queen this past week and I know it's not for nothing. So before you spend anymore money, just tell me what's going on. Then I'll tell you if I need any more bribing," she teases. But the look on his face is less than amused and she starts to think that maybe she's mistaken.  
  
"You really feel that way about our cases, Scully?" he asks, the hurt in his voice almost breaking her heart. "That I would stoop to bribing you just to get you to agree with me?"  
  
She looks down, ashamed that she would even voice such an opinion. Because it's not true. All he ever has to do is ask her for something and she readily jumps to it. She may not be happy about it all the time, but she does it. Because he asks her.   
  
"No, you wouldn't, Mulder," she sighs. "But I'm just confused about all the gifts and stuff. Obviously something is going on with you."  
  
"I told you before, Scully. I just want you to know how much I appreciate you. I don't want you to think I take you for granted," he says. But he reaches up and tugs on his ear. A sure sign to her that he's lying.  
  
"Then if you appreciate me, why don't you just tell me the truth, Mulder," she says gently. "What's really going on? Are you dumping me for another partner?"  
  
She smiles when her joke makes him chuckle. But then the serious look returns to his face almost immediately. She gets out of her seat and walks across the office to perch on his desk.  
  
"Hey, talk to me," she says, running her hand through his hair.   
  
"It's about last week. That case we were on," he says, mumbling into his hands so that she can barely understand him. She takes his hands in her own and squeeze them lightly.   
  
"This is about me holding my gun on you?" she asks guiltily. "Mulder, I'm so sorry. I was delusional. I thought you had betrayed me. And at the time, it was the worst feeling I've ever felt. But when I realized I almost killed you . . . "  
  
"Oh, Scully. Stop. Don't feel guilty about that. You were not to blame for what happened at your mother's house. You didn't hurt me. I'm fine," he assures her. "But something did happen that affected me greatly. Something you may not know about."  
  
"What?" she practically whispers, almost afraid of what he's about to say.  
  
"When you ran from the hotel, I was so afraid we wouldn't be able to find you, Scully. We had teams from both the local police and the FBI searching for you and still couldn't find you. I finally got a call that . . . "  
  
She watches in shock as his face crumbles right before her very eyes. Tears begin to stream down his face and he doesn't even bother to wipe them away.  
  
"Call from who, Mulder?" she prompts him, her own voice starting to waver.  
  
"The Maryland State Police. They thought . . . there was . . . I had to go try to I.D what they thought was your body," he finally gets out.  
  
"No," she gasps, closing her eyes as her own tears finally break free. "You thought I was dead?"  
  
The poor man. She knows what it would do to her if she ever had to identify his body. She knows the pain and emptiness that would fill her heart with him gone. But she never thought it would be the same for him.   
  
"The coroner told me that a state highway patrolman found the body off a rural highway. Nude. Shot in the head. I thought you were dead," he nods. "I could clearly see a picture of you in my head laying on that slab with a bullet between your eyes. So when that curtain opened and I looked into that room, I could only just stare. Because for a moment, I saw you. But then I realized it wasn't you and I felt relieved. God help me, but I was glad that some other woman was dead instead of you."  
  
"I never knew this, Mulder," she cries, pulling him into a hug. "I'm so sorry you had to go through that."  
  
"After your abduction, I realized how important you are to me, Scully. I don't know what I'd do if you weren't here. When I thought you were dead, the other thoughts in my head weren't about how I would live without you. Because I don't think that I could. My only other concern was whether a bullet to the brain or heart would be most effective in ending my sorry life."  
  
"Don't say that," she says, shaking her head. "Don't even think it. Mulder promise me you won't ever consider taking your own life if anything ever happened to me."  
  
She stares into his eyes, pleading for a guarantee from him. But in her heart she knows he won't be able to give it. And looking into his eyes she can see why. His eyes cannot hide the depths of his love for her just as she knows her heart is completely open to him for this one brief moment. But she also knows that neither of them will do anything about it for fear of losing the partnership they do have. A partnership too important to jeopardize right now. So they won't risk it. They'll bury the feelings like they always do. It's not a perfect relationship, but it works for now.   
  
"Just stay alive and you won't have anything to worry about," he jokes, using his humor to deflect the seriousness of the matter, just like she knew he would.  
  
"That's not funny," she says, trying to keep a straight face. But she knows he's trying to make it better with his teasing so decides to play along with him. "So the flowers, the cinnamon rolls, the lunches, the day spa. All about trying to keep me alive?"  
  
"Exactly," he smiles brightly, making her heart lighten instantly. "Just little tokens of my appreciation to thank you for being in my life. And for putting up with me and my quest."  
  
"It's a tough job, but I wouldn't trust anyone else to do it," she says with her own smile. "So if I have to put up with the gifts, I guess it'll just be my cross to bear."  
  
"How magnanimous of you," he laughs. His happy chuckle makes her laugh too. That's all the gift she needs. Knowing that he's happy makes her happy. And from this life, that's all anyone can hope for.  
  
The end. 


End file.
